Oct/15/2001

Sony wants this Gekko bad.

Just as work ended yesterday Sony approached Nintendo and invited the well known console and games company out for a drink. Nintendo, former friend of Sony, was less than enthusiastic about the idea.

"The nerve!" said a slightly peeved Nintendo. "Sony hasn't said one word to me since we fell out back in the early nineties, and has been particularly cold towards me since the release of the PS2. He's only trying to talk to me now because I've got a new console coming into the market place. It's so obvious he just wants to see my specs!"

Nintendo then added, "He'd love to get his hands on my Gekko too."

Apparently the two met back around 93, when Sony had asked for help coming into the console market.

Prompted for what had caused the fallout, Nintendo said: "Yeah, well we were getting along really well, in fact we had just moved in together. Then one day I came home early and there he was; in the lounge room with his hands all over Sega, that slut. Then he started going on about how Sega's got this CD add-on coming out, and how he needs variety."

"Next day, he moved out."

Another company, Microsoft, backs up Nintendo's claims that Sony is only after one thing, "Yeah, I ran into Sony at the pub once, and he spent the entire night trying to get into my box."

Prompted for what that meant exactly, Microsoft replied, "My 'X' box, numb-nuts."

Nintendo and Sony in happier times.

Sony had this to say on the whole affair:
"I don't know what Nintendo's so upset about, all that stuff's in the past. I think Nintendo's annoyed with the success I'm having with my 'The Third Place' youth oriented marketing campaign."

"The third place my arse! Sony thinks the sun shines out of his third place!" said a bemused Nintendo when asked if this was the reason for the rejection. "The PS2 is the only thing that's going to be in 'third place' once the GameCube joins the Game Boy Advance on the streets in a month or two."

Sony still thinks they have a future together though; "Yeah, well I just found out today that Nintendo wants us to appear on The Jerry Springer Show together. I suspect the episode is going to be called 'I'm SORRY, I want you back!' or something similar."

Asked about this, Nintendo told us the title would actually be 'I'm having a THREESOME, and you're not invited!', where Nintendo would tell Sony about "me, IBM and ATI."

-Blake